


A Higher Form of War

by Skyfire511



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers: Prime
Genre: Action
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-14 08:07:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 10,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29788932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skyfire511/pseuds/Skyfire511
Summary: Transformers Prime/Avengers Crossover: Quintessa is still angry at the loss of Aquatron, and Earth seems to be the perfect way to get back at the Cybertronians. But they're not the only ones she has to watch out for. Though newly formed, the Avengers have already made a name for themselves and are ready to protect their home alongside the Autobots at all costs.
Kudos: 5





	1. The Empress

Space.

Some thought of it as a dark void of emptiness. Tiny pricks of light were scattered here and there, but they were a testament to how far away one was from a ball of gas or rock. Of how alone and insignificant one was in the vastness of space.

However, those who were more technologically advanced knew better. Space didn't just have bright points dotting the cosmos here and there. It was painted with colorful galaxies and nebulas. Those tiny dots painted the universe with designs and filled the darkness with light. One was never alone in space because it was simply too big to have only one being in it.

It was in one sector of this vast universe in which one being was sitting on a throne at the end of a long chamber. This being was colored royal blue and gold. Instead of legs, she had long strips of flexible metal billowing beneath her. Her helm was also decorated with shorter strips waving behind her. She was about the size of a grown human, though she was far more powerful. She was currently tapping her fingers against the armrests as she waited for her statistician to arrive.

The tall double doors burst open as a mech stumbled into the room, a teetering stack of datapads clutched to his chassis. He rushed down the carpeted hall to clumsily kneel before the femme.

"You summoned me, Empress?" he asked.

"What's the status of my empire?"

The mech fumbled for the right datapad before reciting, "Your empire has decreased in size by 37%, decreased in power by 22%, decreased in workforce by 18%, and decreased in wealth by 9.7%" The mech shook as he spoke. The Empress never liked to be disappointed. She had thrown a fit after the incident on Aquatron and managed to mutilate her last head statistician even after he died. He didn't want to be next.

The Empress lazily blinked and stared right at him when she opened her optics. "Any new prospects?" she asked.

"Uh- Um. There is one?" he squeaked.

"Is that a question or a statement?"

"A statement! Um, this planet houses billions of organics. The dominant species is not as technologically advanced as we are-"

"No one is."

"Of course, Your Majesty, though they do have weaponry capable of wiping us out if they had enough and knew how to use it."

"So they do have some intellect. Continue."

"This planet is rich in raw resources, as well as the rest of the planets in its solar system, though this is the only one with life. With a little help, they might be able to extract them."

"Resourceful, possibly a source of wealth," the femme commented.

"It is home to a group of heroes known as the Avengers. This group contains two assassins, a supersoldier out of time, a scientist that-" The mech held the datapad at different distances from his face in disbelief before shrugging. "A scientist that turns into a big green grunt when angered because of gamma poisoning, a rich inventor with more advanced technology, and the Asgardian prince Thor."

"So it's a challenge. I like a challenge. Any last notes?" The mech gulped before mumbling incoherently. "Speak up, mech," the Empress said sharply.

"There are also Cybertronians living there." The Empress froze as he finished nervously, "And they're the same ones who liberated Aquatron."

The femme hissed, "Call the generals. Calculate my chances of taking Earth. All scenarios."

"Yes, my lady." He bowed.

"Quaestio." He cringed at the use of his real name. "I am disappointed."

"My sincerest apologies, Empress."

"I don't like being disappointed." She leaned forward and snatched her statistician by the throat. Despite her small stature, she had him dangling above the floor of the ship. "Don't. Disappoint me. Again." She dropped him.

The mech stammered multiple apologies as he collected his datapads and stumbled backward out of the chamber. The Empress leaned back on her throne and pulled up files on the heroes of Earth.

"I will take Earth," she said to no one in particular. "And those wretched mechs will rue the day they ever crossed me."


	2. It's Time to Save the World (Again)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quintessa makes her presence known.

"I went to college!"

"For this, you don't need college!"

They watched as a two men covered in mud continued to fight in the brawl. It was a free-for-all fight, but the Indian kept rambling on about "good party" but "no whiskey". All the punches we're obviously fake, but it did have some humor to it.

"Why are we here again?" Arcee asked Jack.

Jack, who was sitting on Arcee's alt-mode, replied, "One of the best ways to learn about Earth is to see the media. Movies, as awful as this one is, are a good source of culture."

"So, it's part of human culture for them to participate in muddy fights like this?" Bulkhead asked.

"This is an old movie," Miko said. "There are more movies today with better fights, but this is what you get with a drive-in theater that decided to switch out its monster feature last minute!" she whisper-yelled at the end.

"My parents like to watch this movie," Raf said glumly. "I find it rather boring."

"Ditto," Smokescreen jumped in.

(Are you kidding? Cowboy movies are the best! Especially if it's a John Wayne movie!) Bumblebee beeped through his stereo so the other movie-goers couldn't hear him.

Raf translated for Jack and Miko. "He says he likes cowboy movies with John Wayne in them. I didn't know you liked Westerns, Bee."

"I still like Chuck Norris better," Miko said.

"Who's Chuck Norris?" Smokescreen asked.

"Let's go back to base now and I'll show you," Miko said.

(Come on! This one's my favorite!) Bumblebee buzzed excitedly.

"Bee says he'd rather stay," Raf translated.

"I agree. The mud brawl was cool to watch," Bulkhead said.

"Not you too, Bulk!" Miko cried out.

"And look at this part with the robot. It almost looks Cybertronian," Arcee commented.

(Hey! That's not part of the movie!) Bee whirred.

An orange and silver mech appeared on screen. He was in a dark room, his yellow optics glowing like a predator's. ::People of Earth. You are not alone in this universe. Your world is now under the sovereignty of Quintessa, esteemed Empress of the Quintesson empire. It is now your turn to bow before the great Empress and provide for her empire.::

::Ratchet to Arcee, Bulkhead, Snokescreen and Bumblebee. Get back to base; we have a situation.::

::Does it have anything to do with a 'Quintessa'?:: Arcee asked over the comms as she and the others raced back to base.

::How did you know?::

The femme looked back at the orange mech on screen through her sideview mirror. ::Call it a hunch.::

**x x x x x**

"Why are we here again?" Steve asked as he sat down on of the easy chairs in Tony's lounge.

"We're the Avengers," Tony said as if it explained everything.

"We know. But why are we here now?"

"As someone who had a long transit from Madagascar, I'd like to know as well," Bruce said.

"I guarantee you it's not farther than Asgard," Thor said.

"I have important things to do, so let's make this quick, " Clint said, flopping down in one of the chairs.

"Spill, Tony," Natasha said.

Tony clapped his hands together and rubbed them excitedly. "Today, my fellow Avengers, is officially our first annual meeting to stay in the know of Earth's happenings." No one was excited.

"Tony, we live on Earth. We already know what happens on it," Steve said.

"Well, I figure the green giant would be somewhere too remote for internet, and blondie wouldn't even get our news, so here we are! Jarvis, pull up current events."

"The London Olympics have recently started," Jarvis stated.

"I wish Simone Biles was old enough to enter. She's really good at gymnastics," Natasha said.

"You follow gymnastics?" Clint asked.

"Very agile sport. Very useful skill."

"I prefer archery. At least the US got silver in the Team Fita 70m."

"They were cancelled during World War II. All the people are new now anyway," Steve said.

"I never watched the Olympics. I like _Nova Presents_ better," Bruce said.

"So this 'Olympics' is a world-wide competition to determine skill and strength?" Thor asked.

"Pretty much," Bruce answered.

"Do they have pegasus riding?"

"Um. Flying horses don't exist, Thor," Clint said.

"Not on your world, they don't. The feed here is too bland. They prefer golden oats and apples," Thor said.

Tony shrugged. "You learn something new everyday. What else is happening Jarvis?"

Instead of a current event headline, the screen glitched and showed an orange and silver mech.

::People of Earth.::

"I don't think that's Jarvis," Natasha said.

::You are not alone in this universe.::

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," Tony remarked.

::Your world is now under the sovereignty of Quintessa, esteemed Empress of the Quintesson empire.::

"This is not good," they heard Thor mutter.

::It is now your turn to bow before the great Empress and provide for her empire.::

"What's not good?" Bruce asked.

"That psycho has been trying to take over the universe for millennia. She's known as the Great Deceiver and has a grudge against Cybertronians, the only beings who were to defeat her. Twice," Thor told them.

"Sir, our satellites have detected a ship entering the atmosphere," Jarvis said.

"Do you have a visual?" Tony asked. The AI pulled up an image of the descending ship. On the side was a symbol that looked like a halo with six prongs and a blue sun in the middle, this one with three points.

"A scout ship. They'll be sending more to take over your world," Thor said.

"Then let's go kick some more alien ass."

"Language."

"Really, Stripes?"

"It's a preference, Tony."

"We won't have preferences if that lady enslaves us all," Bruce said.

"Hear hear," Thor said.

"Jarvis, send the coordinates to the Quinjet. It's time to save the world again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many disclaimers. I don't own Transformers, Avengers, any John Wayne movies (I do think those are awesome and it's cool how Bee likes them in RiD too!), Nova Presents, or the Olympics.
> 
> My favorite John Wayne movie is McLintock, which is where the quotes come from.
> 
> I figure Thor would know a good deal about Cybertronians and stuff, being a space god.


	3. The Scout Ship Has Landed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The octopus has landed.

"Optimus, do you think Quintessa is doing this as a way to get back at us?" Ratchet asked him as the other returned to base.

"I believe she has many reasons for wanting to enslave Earth, our victory over her chief among them."

"Who's Quintessa?" Raf asked.

"One of Quintus Prime's creations who turned her back on him to conquer the universe. Many millennia ago, she came to Cybertron, claiming to be our creator. We all became slaves to her will until Sentinel Prime freed us from her tyranny. We defeated her once again on Aquatron, liberating all who were enslaved there. It took the combined effort of the Autobots and the Decepticons to defeat the Quintessons, however."

"Well, I guess we'll have to make it three times then," Smokescreen said.

"There's a scout ship headed just south of the Rio Grande in Mexico," Ratchet said.

"Open a groundbridge to the site. Autobots, roll out!"

**x x x x x**

"This is not how I imagined my vacation to Mexico," Steve said in an attempt to lighten the mood. It was just that the Battle of New York was still raw. Knowing that they weren't alone in the universe was a hard to pill to swallow. Sure, Thor was technically an alien, as was Loki, but they looked human. The Chitauri were completely different. Steve couldn't begin to imagine how Tony dealt with it. He actually saw their mothership and its destruction. Imagine what these Quintessons looked liked...

"I should learn Spanish. There are a lot of poverty-stricken people in rural Mexico," Bruce commented.

"So what else can you tell us about this 'Quintessa'?" Tony asked Thor.

"She's human-sized-"

"Sounds easy to beat. A punch to the gut and a blast to the chest," Tony interrupted.

"She's practically a god," Thor added.

"The god of what?" Steve asked.

"Nothing really. She does have control over life processes and is very deceptive. Basic elemental as well."

"Hold on a second. Elemental? As in able to control air, water, and earth?" Clint asked.

"And fire and electricity and-"

"We get it. Not easy to beat," Natasha said.

"She can also control minds."

Everyone just stared at the Asgardian.

"This just gets better and better, doesn't it?" Tony said sarcastically.

Jarvis appeared on the dashboard. "Sir, we've arrived at our destination. Though it appears that we are not alone."

**x x x x x**

The Autobots crept toward the landed spacecraft. Hiding behind large rocks, they snuck up to the ship just as the landing door dropped down. Out came two mechs, one green and silver, the other blue and white, each holding a plasma shotgun.

"Careful, her ladyship's new statmech said there were Cybertronians here," the green one said.

"What about the heroic organics? I hear organics are terrifying," the blue one replied, only to get smacked by his companion.

"Idiot. We are organic! What did you think the exosuits were for?"

"To exercise our organic superiority!"

"Well, you're not wrong," the green one agreed. He pulled out a scanner and waved it around them. It beeped loudly as its beam passed over the Autobots.

"Autobots, prepare yourselves!" Optimus cried out as they stepped into their fighting stances.

"Cybertronians! We need back up!" he yelled at the ship before charging one of them. More Quintessons poured out of the ship while more ships landed from above. Despite their experience, the Autobots were soon outnumbered ten-to-one. They made little progress, but they were still holding out.

For now.

**x x x x x**

"Cybertronians," Thor said when he looked at the image Jarvis acquired. "And the Prime himself is there!"

"I don't follow. Help or hurt, which one?" Clint asked.

"They're on our side," Thor said as he opened the landing door manually, ignoring the big red button lableled 'OPEN'. "For Midgard!" And with that, the Asgardian jumped off of the Quinjet, still several hundred feet from the ground.

Tony sighed. "Jarvis, find a landing spot so we can join Sparky."

"Right away, sir."

"Any last questions? Comments? Concerns?"

"They're really good a fighting," Bruce commented. They couldn't help but notice how skilled they were. It looked as if they had centuries of experience, as scary as that was to imagine.

"And we're good fighters as well. So let's bring our A-game today," Steve said.

"Yes," Tony said, sliding his facemask into place. "A for Avengers. Let's hit the road folks."


	4. Unorthodox Introductions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They kick aft.

Even if their adversaries were just tiny organics in Autobot-sized suits, they sure were hard to beat. It didn't help that more and more kept coming either. Fighting ten bots at the same time wasn't usually a big problem, but they weren't making much progress.

Optimus had just skewered two Quintesson scouts when they sky suddenly darkened. Ominous clouds roiled angrily above them as lightening pierced the darkness. Surprisingly, eight of these bolts struck the scouts sneaking up on his six. He saw a human wielding hammer with lightning crackling around him.

Wait... That was no human and that was no ordinary hammer. It was the Prince of Asgard himself and his trusty hammer, Mjolnir.

"Many thanks, son of Odin," Optimus called out to him.

The god turned and struck a scout into another with his hammer at the same time. "The pleasure is mine, Prime."

(Wait, Thor's here?! As in The Thor?! Why did no one tell me he was on Earth?!) Bumblebee buzzed and whirred excitedly as he shot three times into a scout's chassis, offlining it.

"A fan! I'm flattered," Thor said. Bee squealed with even more excitement at being understood.

"Save your enthusiasm for later, Bumblebee. We still have much to do," Optimus told his young scout.

"And we are here to help you do it. Sparky was just quicker to jump to it," a voice said from above.

"Real funny, Tony. Just shoot the mean aliens already," said a red-haired woman below.

"And, pray-tell, Nat, which ones are the 'mean aliens'?" Tony asked from inside his Iron Man suit, blasting away at Prime's opponents with his gauntlets.

"Any bot with the symbol on his shoulder is friendly," Thor said, pointing to Optimus's shoulder with his free hand while the other was pointing at some enemies to smite them. The humans looked at the symbol and went to work.

**x x x x x**

Arcee's frame was small and quick and she used it to her advantage every time. Weaving between shots was simple for her and made getting close enough to slice the scouts with her wrist blades easy. Unfortunately, when she did get caught, her light frame made it easier to be pinned down. Such was the case as five scouts held her limbs while a six one prepared to Pierce her spark.

Suddenly, the sixth scout's optics darkened and it fell to the ground. In short succession, the others offlined as well. Arcee dropped to the ground and sprang to her pedes immediately. At her pedes was a red-haired woman shooting at her opponent's optics. She had to admit that it was a good strategy for a human that was barely taller than her knees.

"Name's Natasha. Pleasure to work with you," the woman said, shooting a scout through its optics, piercing its processing unit. The actual Quintessons inside crawled out of the cockpits of their outer suits only to get stepped on by Arcee.

"Call me Arcee," she replied, shooting a scout's helm off.

**x x x x x**

Like Bumblebee, Smokescreen only had a pair of blasters to use in battle. Unlike Bumblebee, he didn't have vorns of experience taking down enemies with just his blasters. He hadn't developed the certain creativity war gave one either. Being stuck in a stasis pod for most of the war could do that.

What little creativity he did have he used to blast down trees to pin the Quintessons down so he could offline them easier. Unfortunately, he was starting to run out of trees and he didn't think the humans would take too kindly to him deforesting what little forest was in the area.

Help came in the form of a human shooting specialized arrows at the scouts. His aim was on-target every time, regardless of whether or not he was even looking. His arrows seemed to release an electrical charge with enough power to shock the scouts all the way down to their organic centers.

Realizing that he was breaking Autobot rule number one, Smokescreen hurriedly tried to explain himself. "Um... I'm a classified US drone-"

"And I'm a classified US assassin. Nice to meet you," the archer said. They shared a look. "Cut the crap, kid. I'm Clint Barton."

"Smokescreen," he offered.

"Like I said," Clint shot another arrow to take out a scout's optics. "Nice to meet you."

**x x x x x**

Bulkhead left a trail of destruction in his wake, alternating between using his mace and his blasters. Unfortunately, Quintessons were known for being crafty and intelligence never really was Bulkhead's forte (the synth-en formula didn't count). Soon, he was being dogpiled on by the scouts.

From inside the mountain of mechs, he heard a loud roar nearby. The scouts on top of him screamed as they scrambled to get off of him, but met their ends at the hands of a big, green, muscular human. Bulkhead almost gawked at the ease at which the mutated human shredded the scouts apart.

The human looked at him and smiled, though his happiness seemed to come from his delight at being able to shred the scouts apart and not at the sight of a new victim. "Hulk," he said simply as a way of greeting.

"Bulkhead," he returned, and the two returned to smashing their enemies to bits.

**x x x x x**

Optimus had ended up straying from Thor and Bumblebee, finding himself alone. Well, alone with enemy combatants to hold off. Though no one could take down the Prime, Optimus was beginning to gain more and more cuts and dents from the scouts. His tanks were pinging him for more energon as his levels steadily dropped lower at an alarming rate. If he kept this up, he'd be running on fumes in just an hour or so.

Just as a scout's blade was about to come down on his shoulder, a colorful shield, having been thrown by a man in an equally colorful suit, sliced its helm clean off, allowing Optimus to reach in and squish the Quintesson inside.

"I'm assuming you're Optimus Prime, sir?" the man asked.

"You would be correct in that assumption. And your name, soldier?"

"Steve Rogers, sir. Though most people outside of our team know me as Captain America," he answered while jumping off Optimus' leg to slash at a scout's midsection with his shield.

"I hope you well, Captain," Optimus said, impaling a scout on his blade before transforming it into a blaster and firing the mech off him.

"And I you, sir."

**x x x x x**

Since Optimus as strayed from them, Thor and Bumblebee had ended up partnering to stave off the growing crowd of Quintesson scouts. The Asgardian was impressed with the Autobot scout's skills on the battlefield, considering his age. History of any kind had never been Thor's favorite subject when he was little, but he had taken a liking to reading about the Cybertronian Great War, mostly the gory parts. Bumblebee's sacrifice had always been his favorite story, though it was only now that he realized and appreciated what the mechling had done. If Megatron had gotten his claws on the AllSpark, they probably would've seen the Cybertronians much sooner for all the wrong reasons.

Bumblebee, for his part, was doing everything he could to stay focused on the battle. 'I'm fighting alongside The Thor! Son of Odin, heir to Asgard, wielder of Mjolnir, and totally awesome! After Optimus, of course,' Bee thought to himself. Thor had always been something of a role model to him since he was little. As the war progressed and Bee passed his training with flying colors, the Asgardian had been pushed to the back of his processor in favor of surviving. But now that Thor was standing right there, Bee was so excited to talk with him.

For now, he would stay quiet and fight alongside the god of lightning. That was certainly one dream checked off the list.

**x x x x x**

Meanwhile, Tony was bouncing around from pair to pair, offering his assistance as he got there. The Autobots were all certainly impressed with his technology and made a note to tell Ratchet about him. Later though. They still had some Quintesson skidplate to kick.


	5. The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Basic introductions. And Quintessa has a plan.

The first two scouts seemed to pale as the last of their backup fell to the ground, dead. The blue one slowly shuffled behind his companion as the green one lifted a servo to his comm unit.

"Midgets to Mother. Mother, do you read?"

"Yeah, we need pick up."

The group of heroes turned to look at the scouts.

"Preferably, Now."

They pointed their weapons at the scouts.

"Punctio!" the blue one whined in fear.

"Run, run, RUN!"

The two scouts made a break for it as a spacebridge appeared in front of them. Tony's eyes widened at the sight of the portal as the two scouts leapt through it.

"What kind of technology is that?" he asked, fascinated.

Thor beat Optimus to the question. "That is a spacebridge. Standard method of travel for mechanically based lifeforms."

"Any chance I - uh - we could get one too?"

"Our technology is very dangerous in the wrong hands," Optimus said.

Tony raised his arms in playful surrender. "I'm one of the good guys. I'd never abuse it."

"Unfortunately, we don't possess spacebridge technology."

"Yeah. Only the Cons do," Arcee grumbled, finishing her leader's point.

"You'll have to explain more of... you to us soon. If these were just scouts, I have a feeling Quintessa isn't easily defeated," Steve said, prodding one of the dead scouts with his foot.

"I could tell you all about them," Thor offered.

"Or we could hear it straight from the horse's mouth. From their barn, perhaps." Tony's message was implied.

Optimus weighed the pros and cons of inviting the humans to their base. On one hand, Agent Fowler would most likely want to hear about these powerful people. On the other, Ratchet wouldn't like having to watch over more humans. Of course, they weren't children. It was the suppressed excitement and twitching doorwings of his scout that helped him decide.

"Would you mind coming with us? We will have to inform our liaison that you know about us and it would be easier if he could speak to you in person," Optimus said.

Before anyone else could speak, Tony said, "Sounds like a great idea. Do you have a portal too? Or are we walking?"

:Optimus to base. We require a groundbridge.:

**x x x x x**

Ratchet gaped at the humans that trailed behind the others. "Optimus! Why did you bring more humans?! We have enough as it is!"

Raf, Jack, and Miko rushed to the railing to see who the Bots had brought back with them. They couldn't believe their eyes.

"Dude! You didn't say you were going to bring back the Avengers!" Miko exclaimed.

"Who?" Bulkhead asked.

"That would be us," Clint said as he and the others went up the stairs to join the children on the platform. Miko jumped up and down excitedly.

"Which one of you is the Hulk?" she asked. Bruce said nothing, but everyone pointed to him anyway. "Cool! How angry do you need to be to turn into the Hulk? What were you trying to do that got you turned into the Hulk? Are you really stronger than Thor?"

"Well-"

Thor cut him off by slinging his arm around his shoulder. This left Bruce in an awkward side hunch. "Ah ha ha! Of course not. Everybody knows I'm the strongest Avenger."

"That's not the password I programmed the Quinjet to answer to you with," Tony said, smiling. "Point Break."

"Damn you, Stark."

"Prime!" Everyone turned to see Agent Fowler stalking out of the elevator. "Tell me you have a handle on this 'robot empress' situation. 'Cause she just exposed you and the Cons to the whole world. The UN is freaking out over it and General Bryce is ready to-" He stopped his tirade when he noticed the extra humans in the room. "-flip out. The Avengers. I'd say it's an honor, but your being here makes this worse."

"We're helping the Autobots defeat Quintessa," Thor supplied helpfully.

"Leave to the space god to know what's going on," Fowler muttered under his breath. "Would you mind appearing before the UN later? I feel like they'd take the alien business better if it came from someone who at least looks human."

"No problem."

"Great. I'm... I'm going to go file some paperwork. Get my head on straight," he said before taking the elevator back up.

"So, what's your story?" Natasha asked.

"Yeah, that is what we came here for," Tony said, reaching one hand toward a piece of machinery.

"Ep, ep, ep! Don't touch. It's broken," Ratchet scolded him.

"Who stuck a pipe up his a-?"

"Don't finish that curse," Steve cut him off as quietly as Tony had whispered it.

"My pistons may be rusty, but my hearing's sharp as ever!" Ratchet called back.

"Good to know, Oscar the Grouch," Tony said loudly.

"Who?" Ratchet asked, not understanding the reference.

(Ooh! He called you a grump, Ratchet!) Bee buzzed and chirred in laughter. Ratchet just huffed and mumbled something about "canned sardines".

Optimus walked over to the railing to face the Avengers. "It is a long story."

"We have time until Quintessa strikes again. Lay it on us," Bruce said.

**x x x x x**

"I told you not to disappoint me," the Empress snarled. The statmech trembled violently before her. I see that you managed to allow over two hundred scouts to perish for nothing and we are no closer to taking over Earth than we were before!"

"My lady, I can explain!"

"Quickly then, Quaestio."

"This battle was a test of their skills. To see where their weaknesses are. How we need to train your troops. I now have even more data to use for my probabilities."

"And what are my chances? Give me a range. I will not be blinded by the vest case scenario like last time."

"60 to 99 percent. Though I can shorten the range to 95-99 if-"

"Make it 100," she growled, waving her hand to dismiss him.

"Yes, my lady," he squeaked, bowing low before scooting out of the room backwards.

"Punctio! Keikja!" The blue and green scouts came forward respectively. "I have a special mission for you," she purred creepily. They shifted nervously, then squawked in fear as chains appeared and wrapped around their limbs, holding them in place. "For your lady." The femme shocked them with waves of energy, making them scream in agony.

The two scouts looked at each other in shock as their minds cleared for just a moment, then the fog came rushing back. They spoke in unison:

"All hail Quintessa."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ratchet has been dubbed 'Oscar the Grouch' for reasons. Oscar likes kids (Raf, Bee, who else should I add to this list) but not most people (most everyone else, except Optimus for sure). I don't own Sesame Street either.


	6. Ratchet and Tony

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonding chapter #1.

"So, you guys are stuck here. On Earth," Natasha said after Optimus had finished recounting their tale.

"With the likes of you, yes," Ratchet replied sarcastically.

"If anything we heard about Quintessa is true, you might not be stuck with us for much longer unless we can defeat her," Clint said.

"And we will defeat her," Steve said. "All we need is a plan of attack and the appropriate training."

_Beep Beep Beep_

"We're receiving a communications request from the Nemesis," Ratchet informed them as they moved toward the console.

"Quintessa's going after the Cons too?" Bulkhead asked.

"She has a grudge against all Cybertronians. The Decepticons are not exempt from her wrath," Optimus said. He nodded at Ratchet to put themessage request. Megatron's face filled the screen, though they could tell that he looked defeated if the red streak on the side of his face was anything to go by.

::Prime.::

"Megatron."

::I assume you know about the Quintessons.::

"You assume correctly."

::And you know that I will not allow anyone other than myself to rule this world.::

"I see your reason hasn't changed from... last time."

:

:Then meet me at these coordinates with your Autobots in three days. We should at least make an effort at a coordinated attack against Quintessa.::

The call ended abruptly when Megatron hung up without warning.

"That's Megatron?" Clint asked. "He looks worse than the Chitauri."

"You're not seriously considering another truce with him, Optimus. Not after last time," Ratchet said, his optics wide upon seeing his leader's thoughtful expression.

"Only together were we able to defeat the Quintessons. We will have to join forces if we are to have any hope of doing it again."

"And this time, you'll also have us to back you up," Thor said. "I can make a call to Asgard too if we need it."

"I am unwilling to risk human lives. Even if they are not technically human."

"Besides," Ratchet huffed. "Odin would have our helms if you were killed."

"Enough with the chit-chat already!" Miko blurted out. "What's the game plan?"

**x x x x x**

"Aw!"

"Sorry, Miko. You can't be in the sparring room. It's too dangerous," Bulkhead told her as he gently pushed her out of the room she was trying to sneak into.

"But I wanna be part of the action!" she whined.

"You can watch from the main room. Besides, I heard Optimus is making Ratchet do this too."

Miko's eyes lit up mischievously as Optimus walked past them into the sparring room, pulling a reluctant Ratchet behind him. The medic grumbled about "lucky humans" as he finally walked through the large doorway by himself to preserve what dignity he had left. Once the pair were on the far side of the room, Bulkhead and Miko burst into laughter.

"I CAN STILL HEAR YOU!"

They only laughed harder.

**x x x x x**

"Why can't one of the others go first!"

"Ratchet, Mr. Stark isn't that bad," Optimus chided him.

"And there's worse?" Ratchet asked, cocking an optic ridge at the Prime.

"There are worse humans in the world."

"But in this room, Tony takes the cake."

"You baked me a cake?" Tony joked. "That's so sweet, Doc. Did you put your sarcasm into it?"

"Don't call me 'Doc'! Optimus, I swear he's worse than Wheeljack!"

"Oh-oh! No swearing. Or else Captain Gramps will say you're naughty," Tony teased.

"Will you stop joking if we go first?" Ratchet asked Tony.

"Yep."

"Fine. Have it your way," he tossed back at Optimus. The semi just smiled as the two walked to the center of the room.

Ratchet sighed before saying, "You all know that this is training to take down Quintessons. While an actual Quintesson is a small, squishy blob of sentient organic material, they have been known to make and use exo-suits of Cybertronian nature. They reside in a cockpit housed in the center of the chassis, or chest. While killing the Quintesson directly would make the fight quicker, the cockpit is heavily fortified. As a human, your best bet is to offline the exo-suits, forcing the Quintesson to leave and make himself vulnerable. Debilitate, then strike. Or just strike if you know where to hit. Most of our pressure points are in the same spots, though Cybertronians have a few more. Got all that?"

"You lost me after 'training'." Tony said, flipping his facemask into place. "Bring it on, Doc bot."

"My name is not 'Doc bo-' AHH!" Ratchet had to quickly dodge the blast Tony shot from his gauntlets lest he end up with a fried optic. It had been a while since Ratchet had gone out into the field and fought, but he held his own until Tony managed to hold his own blade against his throat.

"I've seen better fights from robins," Tony jested.

"And I've seen better moves from the Astronomechs. And I hate that mech band," Ratchet returned.

"Aw. They're not that bad, Ratchet!" Smokescreen protested from the wall.

"You're going next!" Ratchet yelled back before facing his designated partner again. "I don't know why I got put with you-"

"Because we're inventors," Tony cut him off, actually catching the medic by surprise. "We want what's best for our teams, our worlds, and will do anything to make it happen."

"Don't forget annoying," Clint muttered under his breath.

"But essential," Smokescreen added.

"He's not even athletic," Thor said.

"But I have brains," Tony argued.

"So?"

"I'm the genius who coded your voice recognition for the Quinjet."

Thor's eyes widened in shocked rage, then squinted as he muttered inaudibly about "dumb nicknames".

Throughout the argument, Ratchet couldn't help but think about his own desire to help the team even though he was strategically useless in most battles. The "incident" with the synthetic energon was most prominent in his thoughts. If Tony really was that similar to him, it couldn't be that bad.

He was dying to talk to someone about higher science theories anyway. No one on Team Prime had the smarts for it. He needed someone with a real processor.

Brains would also be acceptable.

"Get off me. I want to know how you made that armor," Ratchet said.

"They're not for sale," Tony said.

Ratchet looked at Optimus. As if knowing what the medic was thinking about, he nodded and smiled. "Perhaps you'd be willing to trade then."

"Oh?"

"Although, groundbridge technology is rather complicated-"

Tony promptly let him up. "Show me the way, Doc."

Ratchet fumed for a moment before sighing and leading the way to the groundbridge. Once everyone else was sure they were gone, they all breathed a collective sigh of relief.

"I thought they'd never see eye to eye," Natasha said.

"We call them optics, not eyes," Arcee corrected her.

"Well, now that they're going to be spending some quality time together, how about we start the real fighting," Thor said.

"WE CAN HEAR YOU!"


	7. Sure Thing, Kid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or, Clint makes Smokescreen get high and deals with the aftermath.

"Smokescreen and Clint. You two are next," Optimus said.

The rookie was hyped up to spar with his designated partner. He wasn't entirely sure why they were partnered together, but he'd go along with whatever Optimus said. Then he realized something.

"Wait! What about the 'no harming humans' rule?"

"The point of this is to teach the humans how to take us down. Since the Quintessons are completely linked to their suits, our pressure points should work the same as theirs," Arcee said.

"Don't we have to know what your pressure points are then?" Natasha asked.

"Human pressure points are similar too," the femme replied.

"Good thing I don't need pressure points to take you down, kid," Clint said, nocking a stun arrow into his bow. Smokescreen barely had time to react before a powerful electrical charge swept through his frame. He convulsed noiselessly on the spot before everything went black.

**x x x x x**

"-okescreen? Smokescreen! Wake up!"

"Urgh," Smokescreen groaned as he onlined his optics to the sight of a familiar human.

"You okay, kid?" Clint asked, stepping away from his frame to give him some room.

"Hey, guys. He doesn't need to learn anything. He can just do... that," the rookie said, still dazed from the blast.

"Go see Ratchet to make sure the charge has fully dissipated," Optimus said.

"Sorry I knocked him out like that. I thought I picked the arrowhead I turned down the charge for," Clint apologized.

"This was a judge of your ability to defeat opponents of our nature. Since you are able to do so, would you mind guiding him to the medbay?" Optimus asked.

"Shouldn't he know where it is?"

"I wonder what pancakes taste like."

Clint stared at the young bot in mild surprise. "Nevermind. No problem, Optimus. Come on, kid. Time to follow the leader."

"What if there was a party of Primes? Would they still party?" Smokescreen asked, a dreamy look on his face.

"I'm sure they'd break out the alcohol at some point. Or whatever you guys drink to get drunk. Come on."

**x x x x x**

"You're lucky you're human," Ratchet told Clint as he shut off his scanner. "Otherwise, I'd smack you for what you did."

"But he'll be fine, right?" Clint asked.

"If you baked a cake in a cup, would it be a cupcake?" Smokescreen wondered out loud.

"It'll take time for his frame to work out the electrical overload, so I suggest you don't touch him for a while. Not unless you want a taste of your own pills," Ratchet said.

"It's 'a taste of your own medicine', Doc."

"My name is not-!"

"And I don't mind waiting for him to get his head on straight," Clint cut him off.

Ratchet sighed. "I'll be in my lab. Your friend has some rather good technology I'd like to examine."

"You call this a lab? I've seen ant colonies with more organization than this. Literally," Tony called from the 'lab'. Ratchet just rolled his optics as he returned to his partner, leaving Clint alone with Smokescreen.

"Hey, Ca... Cl... Cr... Clint! Clint. D'you have a fam'ly?"

The question caught Clint off guard for a heartbeat, but his face betrayed nothing other than an imperceptible twitch of his eye. "Why do you ask?"

"You called me 'kid'. That means you can tell," Smokescreen said.

Clint chose his next words carefully. " One could say that I've had experience with analyzing others. It's a good skill to have for my job."

"You shoot kids?"

"No!"

' _Ah. I said that too quickly.'_

"But do you have a family?" the rookie asked again.

"Wait, are you really a kid?"

"Me first."

"You're incapacitated. I have the advantage. Answer me first, kid," Clint said, a hint of playfulness edging his 'threat'.

"I'm like... a teenager. But I was in stasis for a while, soooo..."

"Can't imagine being asleep for that long. Well, maybe Cap can," Clint commented.

"All I ever wanted to do was be in the Elite Guard," Smokescreen said, the charge starting to wear off. "By the time I was old enough it was more of a boot camp, but I never gave up." He paused as if he was considering what to say next. "It was what my creators wanted," he said slowly. "They died in combat just as I was about to go to the academy. I know I'm destined for great things. After all, I'm on Optimus Prime's team! But it was kinda for my creators too."

"I think you'd like my family," Clint whispered to him. Smokescreen turned his helm to face him. "My wife, Laura, she would be all over you. Cooper and Lila would probably ask you to do something cool. They're still young enough for that. I think."

"Maybe we can visit them once we make sure Quintessa doesn't enslave Earth?" the rookie offered.

Clint gave him a smile he usually reserved for his family. "Sure thing, kid."


	8. Bulk and Hulk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonding chapter #3.

Bulkhead winced as the rookie dreamily followed Clint out of the sparring room. "I hope he's okay," he heard Bruce say from below.

"He'll be alright. After all, we've been through worse. Right, Bulk?" Arcee said as she tapped him with her elbow.

"You're not going to let me live that down, are you?" Bulkhead asked, aware of what she was getting at.

"Never."

"What are you two talking about?" Natasha asked.

"When we first came to Earth, I walked into a bunch of power lines," Bulkhead said as he rubbed the neck of his neck, a habit he'd picked up from the humans.

"Yeah. Never knew he could dance like that," Arcee jested. Bumblebee chittered in what was obviously laughter.

It was Bruce's turn to wince. He looked at his partner. "That sounded like it hurt."

"Eh. It was really tingly though." This sent Bee into a fit of laughter that shorted out his already broken voicebox. His static coughs brought down the mood.

"Bumblebee, go see Ratchet," Optimus said, gently pushing the scout toward the doorway.

(Aw- _skzzt_ -www! I wa- _skzzt_ -o nex- _skzzt_ ,) Bee whined, the static making it hard to understand him.

"Don't worry, scout. We'll get our turn soon," Thor assured him as he followed him to the medbay

"So, wanna go next?" Bulkhead asked his partner.

Bruce chuckled nervously and replied, "Look, I'd be excited to do this too if I were you but I don't think I'd be able to keep the Other Guy in line."

"It may be hard to believe, but I'm tougher than I look. I'll be okay. They'll be okay," Bulkhead said, gesturing towards the others in the room.

"Are you sure?"

"Don't worry about coming back, Bruce. We'll be here for you," Natasha said.

"Show them how it's done," Steve added.

Finally smiling, Bruce said, "Thanks for the support guys, but now I'm not angry anymore."

"Why do you need to be angry?" asked Bulkhead.

"It's how I turn into the Other Guy. But I'm sure he'll come out if you hit me."

The green mech looked confused for a moment before his optics widened in understanding. "Wait, you mean-"

"Sure. Hit me." Bruce walked to the middle of the room. Bulkhead looked to Optimus for guidance about hitting a seemingly defenseless human. When he nodded, Bulkhead geared up to hit him when...

"So, are your parents big green monsters too? Or is it just you?"

"Miko!"

Bruce stood still, processing the girl's questions.

_"...big green monsters...just you..."_

_"just you"_

He was supposed to be over this. His dad was dead. It didn't matter anymore. He knew he was different. He-

Bruce couldn't even finish that thought before the Hulk took over. His clothes shredded at the seams as he grew in size and strength. He gave an almighty roar as he jumped at Bulkhead, taking the mech by surprise.

The Wrecker held Hulk by his wrists as best as he could without crushing them and yelled, "Miko! Get back!" Miko did this, but not before snapping a picture of the two.

Bulkhead and Hulk grappled back and forth for what seemed like a while at the time, though it only lasted for about ten minutes. It started to get serious when Hulk tore off a piece of his opponent's armor to get to the vulnerable protoform underneath.

Arcee started and moved to break them up, but Optimus held his arm in front of her. She looked at him incredulously. "This is a test of capability. It is not over."

Natasha, however, didn't care for what Optimus had to say, Prime or not. She got right in between the two and motioned for Bulkhead to back off. Still confused and unwilling to actually harm Hulk, he complied. Natasha slowly walked toward Hulk until he growled at her, hands open and empty.

"Come on, Bruce, I know you're in there," she said. "There's no need to fight."

"HULK SMASH!"

"You don't need to, Big Guy. It's fine. You know what, I bet the sun's gettin' real low right about now. I always heard the sunsets were pretty around here. You wanna watch one?"

Hulk came closer on his own, slowly stretching out one of his massive hands to touch Natasha's hands. They were both silent as she let him slide his hand in hers. Suddenly, he stumbled backwards, his green, muscular form shrinking back into the man he was, if now shirtless. Bruce laid on the ground for a few seconds soaking in his regained control and slowly sat up.

"You okay, Bruce?" Bulkhead asked, the worry evident in his voice.

"I'm okay now," Bruce replied, cracking a smile. "Let's say we let those two pick who's going next on their own.

"Agreed. And Miko?"

"That was so cool! What do you do after you rip your shirt? How did she calm you down? How did you take down Bulk? Have you ever lifted a car?"

"Miko," Bulkhead repeated, interrupting her barrage of questions.

"Yeah, Bulk?"

"No music on the way to school for a week."

"Aww!" she groaned. "But you love it too!"

"I'll live."

**x x x x x**

Now on top of the roof, Bulkhead and Bruce sat quietly watching the sun set over the horizon. It still had a long way to go, but it was nice seeing the sky bloom with reds, yellows, pinks, and oranges. However, it was still quite awkward considering what had just happened.

Bulkhead reset his vocalizer before attempting to break the ice. "You know, I've never really seen the sunsets here."

"Really?" Bruce asked. "If I lived here, I'd watch them every day. Unwind after a long day, you know?"

"I feel ya."

Neither had anything to contribute after that.

"Look, I get if you don't like me because I turn into a big, green rage monster when I get angry, so you don't have to try to get along with me or anything," Bruce blurted out.

"I don't not like you," Bulkhead said. "I think it's kinda cool that you can do that."

"Really?" Bruce asked.

"Sure. I may not be a science person like Ratchet, but I do know that radiation is harmful to humans. The fact that you're still alive means you're strong."

"So if I stuck my head in a microwave, could I be strong too?" said a voice from behind them. They turned to see Miko walking toward them.

"Miko," Bulkhead started.

"Before you say anything, I just want to say that I'm sorry for asking so many questions," Miko apologized, swiping at the ground with her feet. Sometimes I get a little in over my head-"

"Sometimes?" Bulkhead asked skeptically.

"Okay, usually," she admitted.

"A little?"

"Yeah, yeah, I know. The point is, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I get that I'm too curious sometimes."

"Hey, don't worry about it," Bruce said, waving her over to sit with them. "Curiosity is the reason I started turning into the Other Guy in the first place."

"Really?" she asked.

"Yep." Bruce looked around as if checking to see if anyone else was watching them. "And if you're interested in listening to nerd speak, I can tell you how I did it," he said with a smile.

Miko's eyes lit up. "Awesome!" she exclaimed, pumping a fist in the air in excitement. "What about you Bulk?"

"It'll probably go right over my helm," he said. "But maybe I'll learn something too."


	9. Two Scouts on a Mission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonding intermission. We see the Quintesson scouts.

It was almost eight by the time Keikja and Punctio were released from the mothership. Quintessa had been relentless in her torture, but it was all according to the plan she had laid out for them. Speaking of which...

"Keikja?" asked the blue Quintesson by his side as they dragged themselves through the desert they had been dropped off in.

"Yes, Punctio?" the green one, Keikja, responded.

"What was the plan again?" Punctio asked, his wide and curious green optics centered on his green companion.

Keikja halted abruptly and pressed his good servo to his faceplate in exasperation. ' _Dumb idiot. Dumb, lovable idiot. Dumb, lovable, naive idiot. Curse those optics; need the Scientist to dampen the optical relays from his eyes. ARGH!_ '

"Do you need me to number it for you, numb nodes?" Keikja hissed. Punctio nodded enthusiastically before wincing at the pain it caused. The green Quintesson sighed in defeat. "Step one: The Empress tortures us so we look beat up."

"Ooh! We did that already," Punctio exclaimed.

"Yes, we did," he responded. But in his mind, he thought, ' _It's like I'm talking to a new form._ ' Keikja continued out loud, "Step two: we each find a faction's base and infiltrate it." At Punctio's confused look, he added, "Which means we act like we wanna be friends and get as much important information as possible without letting them know that we are getting information."

"So we'll be spies!"

"Exactly! Step three: after we figure out their weakness, we say that we're going for a walk outside so we can call for the mothership to pick us up."

"What if I don't wanna go for a walk?" the blue one challenged.

"It- You- I- It doesn't matter! You just get out of there without letting them know you won't come back," Keikja said.

"And then what, Kay-Kay?"

"Firstly, no nicknames. Step four: we tell our Lady and the Statistician what we found out so they can use it to take over the planet."

"Okay!"

"Now repeat to me what I just said."

"We get beat up, we spy on them, we escape, and then we superiors what we learned."

"Good idiot! Since our Lady has already marked the leader, you go to the Decepticons and I'll go to the Autobots," Keikja told him.

"Okay!"

"Here's the code for the distress signal," the green scout said, uploading the data to his partner. "And remember, don't tell anyone you still work for our Lady, and don't tell anyone you're spying on them."

"But that's treason!"

"Our Lady knows what we are doing. It will be excused." They came upon a road sign that said "Jasper, Nevada: 15 miles". "This is where we part. Walk in the opposite direction of where I'm going for 15 breems before you use the distress signal I gave you. Okay?"

"Okay!"

Before Keikja could protest, Punctio wrapped his arms around his smaller frame in a hug the green Quintesson couldn't get out of.

"I'm gonna miss you, Keikja," Punctio said, nuzzling his neck.

"Yeah yeah. Whatever," Keikja replied. "Now let go of me, you sappy blob. You're digging into my wounds."

"Sorry. Bye, Kay-Kay!" Punctio said, running away as fast as his limp allowed him before Keikja could kick him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, did you know that Punctio is for punch and Keikja is for kick? Got them off the etymology tab in my offline dictionary app. Good for weird names.


	10. Red, White, and Blue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonding chapter #4.

The moment Bruce, Bulkhead, and Miko left the sparring room, Steve turned to Natasha and opened his mouth to say something, but closed it. He did this multiple times, speechless until he managed to ask, "How did you do that?"

Natasha just shrugged at him with a slightly smug smile and said nonchalantly, "Feminine intuition."

"Human femmes never cease to surprise me," Arcee said, remembering all the times Miko snuck through the groundbridge to fulfill her daily adrenaline quota.

"I'll surprise you some more if you want to go next. If Cap and Optimus are cool with it too," Natasha added at the end.

"You can go first, Optimus. Steve," Arcee said.

"How about a coin flip," Steve suggested, digging through the many pockets in his suit to find a suitable coin. Ten paper clips, four pens, two flasks, and a comb later, he finally pulled out a shiny quarter.

"Got a measuring tape in those pockets too?" Natasha teased. To her surprise, he pulled three out.

At her questioning look, he said, "It helps to be prepared."

"If you could find anything," she joked back.

"Optimus is the same," Arcee said, inclining her helm towards the mech.

Said mech smiled almost sheepishly and said, "It is true. I store a number of odd objects in my subspace. Most of which I forget about."

"Let's not forget about our spar. Flip the coin, Steve," Natasha ordered.

"Yes, ma'am." Setting the coin on the side of his closed fist and flicking his thumb, Steve launched the quarter into the air. They all watched as it made a myriad of flips before he caught it as it fell and gave it a final flip without peeking.

"Call it."

"Heads," Natasha said. Steve lifted his hand, revealing the eagle on the back of the quarter. "Well. You win, Cap."

Steve smiled and kicked his shield onto his arm as he said, "I hope you're ready, Optimus."

"I too am very prepared."

Their audience watched with small smiles as the two males circled each other, scouting out their opponent for any weaknesses. Finally, it seemed they decided they were ready to start and they charged at each other. Optimus moved to flick Steve away with a massive servo. But being larger made the Prime slow, which he took to his advantage. The man dodged the servo and swung around his legs to climb up the Cybertronian. Optimus reared back in reflex but wasted precious time doing this. Steve managed to climb up to his torso before he was swept off.

It went on like this for almost an hour before Optimus managed to pin Steve under the point of his blade with barely an inch to spare.

"Surrender, Captain Rogers," Optimus pressed. From Steve's perspective, it looked like the tip of the blade was dancing on top of his right eye.

"Sounds like good advice, Cap," Natasha teased as Steve conceded to surrendering.

"Don't take it personally. Primes are hard to defeat," Arcee said.

"If only the Decepticons were easy to beat, then you wouldn't still be fighting a war." Everyone turned to see Thor walking back into the room with Bumblebee on his heels. "I see that the ladies have yet to have their catfight."

"Arcee, how about we show the boys what a real fight is," Natasha said.

"Bring it on."


	11. Girlpower

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meh bonding chapter #5.

Arcee and Natasha moved to the center of the room while Bee and Thor took a spot by the wall to watch them alongside Optimus and Steve. The two girls dropped into their respective fighting stances and walked along an invisible circle, waiting for the other to slip up and reveal a weakness for her to exploit.

"Hurry up, ladies! Agent Flower wants me to speak with his leader within the hour. I don't have all day," Thor called out.

Arcee spared him a quick glance, which Natasha took as her opportunity to strike. In the split second, the femme had been distracted by Thor, Natasha had cleared the space between them and was jumping into her left knee guard to slice the cabling there. Arcee managed to swat her off before she could do any real damage, but the assassin managed to cut a minor energon line open. Now she had less energy in her lower left leg, which would make her slower by a small, yet significant amount. And it seemed Natasha knew this, judging by the way she was barely holding back.

The two grappled somewhat, Natasha always just out of reach for Arcee to pin down, but having to move quickly to avoid her opponent. For their audience, it looked as if the assassin was monkeying across the Bot's frame. Eventually, Arcee lost enough energon for Natasha to score another slash between the seams of her back plating. However, Arcee's resulting flinch, threw her off, allowing the femme to twist around and hold her wrist blades to her throat, effectively pinning her to the ground.

With no way to escape, Natasha admitted defeat. "Okay, warrior femme. You win." Arcee let her up. As Natasha walked away, she murmured, "For now." Arcee pretended not to hear her, but if the woman had turned around, she would have seen a smile on her face.


	12. Rewind to the Medbay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last bonding chapter #6.

_This sent Bee into a fit of laughter that shorted out his already broken voicebox. His static coughs_ _brought_ _down the mood._

_"Bumblebee, go see Ratchet," Optimus said, gently pushing the scout toward the doorway._

_(Aw-_ _skzzt_ _-www! I wa-_ _skrshh_ _-o nex-_ _sksst_ _,) Bee whined, the static making it hard to understand him._

_"Don't worry, scout. We'll get our turn soon," Thor assured him as he followed him to the medbay._

**x x x x x**

The walk was silent. Partially because Bumblebee's voicebox was broken, but also because they didn't have any common conversation points.

But mostly because Bee couldn't talk.

To get to the Medbay from the hallway, they had to pass the small section of the base dedicated to the lab. Which meant that they had to pass Ratchet.

"And just what do you think you are doing over here?" the medic asked.

"His voicebox is malfunctioning. We thought you might be able to fix it," Thor said. Bee nodded.

Ratchet looked Bumblebee over as if assessing if any damage had been done to him yet and sighed. He glanced at Tony to make sure he wasn't doing anything he had to yell at him for and said, "Come on. It's not as if you're interrupting me. Not that I've been interrupted before." He mumbled the last part.

Once in the Medbay, Ratchet had Bumblebee sit on the other berth, as Smokescreen was occupying the other one with Clint. Ratchet started scanning the scout's throat. "What happened?" he asked.

"He was laughing," Thor supplied helpfully.

Ratchet huffed and looked at the scout. Bee had the decency to look ashamed. He shivered as Ratchet passed the scanner over his throat again.

"Just needs to be recalibrated. Hold still," Ratchet said, kneeling to fidget with Bumblebee's voicebox settings.

"Have you two gone yet?" Clint asked Thor from his perch on Smokescreen's medberth.

"Not yet. Banner and the wrecker should be going at it."

They heard a roar coming from the sparring room.

"If anyone else comes in damaged, I'm going to rearrange their hydraulic systems," Ratchet grumbled. Bumblebee snickered at this, which earned his doorwings a sharp pinch from the medic. "Keep still. I'm almost finished.

A crash was heard this time, but it was much closer. It was followed by a muttered "uh oh" that everyone heard.

Ratchet got up and started walking to the lab. "Wait here. What are you doing over there, Stark?!"

The medbay was silent save for the occasional beep of a computer. Thor contemplated talking to his partner, but he didn't want Clint listening in. And Bee was unable to communicate verbally. Better basic questions than nothing though. "So... How are you feeling, scout?"

Bee, knowing Ratchet would be upset if he tried using his voicebox now, nodded and gave him a thumbs up.

Thor nodded. The god of lightning glanced at Clint and Smokescreen before speaking, "That's good." His hands moved while he spoke, and to the trained eye (or optic), they said, -Do you understand me?-

Bee's optics widened. His optical ridges moved down and his head tilted before he responded similarly: -You know Cybertronian Sign Language?-

-When I heard about Cybertronians, I was wild to learn everything I could. Mostly about your fighting abilities. It was the only reason I ever went into a library, besides dragging Loki out of it to spar.-

-I learned after Tyger Pax. Binary only has one volume, so it doesn't lend itself to stealth. CSL let me go on missions again. Neither are very good at emotion though. Especially with the mask on.- Bee's optics saddened.

' _Don't be brash; this is a touchy subject._ '

-Stories of your victory at Tyger Pax have already been written into history. You must be proud of that.-

The scout looked away. -I don't take much pride in it. I was just doing my duty to Cybertron.-

' _And you made him sadder. Nice move._ '

-Since coming to Earth, I have learned that battle is not glorious. Though I still have much to learn.- It was silent(er) for a moment. -My father will always be my role model and I idolized Optimus Prime for a time while growing up, but I admired the courage you had while facing Megatron. I still do, actually.-

Bumblebee looked back at him and smiled. -Thanks,- he signed. -I looked up to Optimus as my role model, but I always thought you were cool for being able to charge into battle fearlessly.-

This time the silence was companionable. However, Clint was now staring at them intently. "Is there some space code that I don't know that I need to know?" he whispered to his partner.

"I think it's CSL," Smokescreen replied.

"CSL?"

"Cybertronian Sign Language. I never bothered to learn it."

"Why not?"

"Even if you download the language packs, they don't help you 'speak' it. Didn't wanna practice, didn't wanna download."

Clint looked at him incredulously. "You can download languages?!"

"And they have a universal translator," Thor said, grinning.

"The possibilities..." he trailed off.

Ratchet strode back into the Medbay, grumbling all the while. "Now that's taken care of, one more calibration and you can go Bumblebee, Thor."

Bee nodded and held still so the medic could finish fixing his voicebox. Once he was done, the two of them were sent back to the sparring room.

"And if either of you come back after your spar with more injuries, I won't hesitate to add more dents to your helm!"

(We'll be careful, Ratchet!) Bee buzzed back.

**x x x x x**

They walked back into the sparring room just in time to see the finale to Steve and Optimus' fight. They then sat through the "catfight" Natasha and Arcee had, as Thor had put it. Finally, it was their turn. Bee held in his enthusiasm as he and his partner walked to the center of the room to face off. This wasn't something he had ever dreamed of doing, but it was certainly exciting.

But the moment Thor lifted his hammer, he knew he needed to plan. If the god of thunder ever got Mjolnir on top of him, his chances of winning would decrease drastically.

Thor was thinking along the same lines. As long as he either stayed out of reach or got too close to be dislodged, he could drop his hammer on Bumblebee and he'd have the fight in the bag.

'I'll just have to stay on top,' they both thought.

Thor charged first, swinging his hammer to gain some momentum before letting its inertia fly him to his opponent. Knowing blocking would be ineffective, Bee moved aside, but Thor changed his trajectory midflight to slam into his helm. Crashing to the ground, he immediately rolled until the god lost his balance and fell off, not giving him a chance to plant his hammer.

Bee jumped to his pedes, his optics widening when he saw Thor charge his hammer with electricity just slightly. He didn't plan on knocking him out like Clint did with Smokescreen, but if he could shock him into falling over, he'd have enough time to put Mjolnir on him.

With a flick of his wrist, a small burst of lightning streaked toward the scout. Bumblebee dropped to the ground with reflexes born from a lifetime of war, but the lightning was still attracted to his metallic frame. His self-repair hurried to fix his fried circuitry, but Thor had already planted Mjolnir on his chassis. The pressure felt odd on his back. He tried to move, but the weight somehow increased without Thor doing anything, so he held still.

"So, little scout," Thor said. "Do you surrender?"

(I surrender to Mjolnir. You didn't do a thing.) Bumblebee whirred, his optics sparkling with mischief.

"You've got a fiesty tongue on you. I think for that I'll let you go." Thor easily picked up his hammer and stepped off of his opponent. Bee got to his pedes.

"And that's how it's done, my fine lady and femme."

"Just because you can light up a Christmas tree doesn't mean you're better," Natasha retorted.

"How about that, Bee?" Arcee said.

(My self-repair can handle fried circuitry. Your leg's still leaking. I'm not going to have to face Ratchet.)

The realization dawned on her. "Oh Primus."

Everyone laughed.


End file.
